Ok, I need to get something off my chest...

I'm getting really sick and tired of trying to keep track of everyone and everything. I try my damnedest to keep in touch, and when, for the first time in god knows how long I actually have a night to myself, I can't get in touch with anyone in missoula. What pisses me off even more is that I'm able to talk with all my friends UNTIL I suggest hanging out...All of a sudden, they mysteriously never get my messages, or they never get back to me.

Frankly, I'm pissed. I care for my friends like they were my family, yet I can never get close enough to them to really consider them as family. Then, when they have important things going on, like anniversaries, or parties, or actual FREE TIME when I do, they suddenly get emo and upset that I'm not keeping track of them all the time.

Even Troy and I are suffering...we never talk (though gods know I try to talk every night), we never fuck, and we seem to be always fighting, and usually it's about some of the most petty things, like what spoon to use when making mac 'n cheese, who's sleeping on too much of the bed, who's turn it is for dishes, who hasn't cleaned up the house, blah blah blah.

Finally, it makes me rather upset that two of the people I consider to be my best friends will be leaving missoula to go on with their own lives this summer, and I haven't really hung out with them since Halloween. I certainly hope one of them reads this and knows how much I care about them.

end rant. comments, questions, debate, and snarky comebacks are welcome and encouraged now.

I'm such a copy-cat-who-thinks-he's-a-dog.

So for all two of you who be watching this (and maaaybe one or two stalkers if I'm lucky), my 2008 end-of-year celebration post may very well be a long one, so bear with me.

First, in the news: School last semester went rather well. I'm just glad to be done with exceptionalities...next up, Ethics at 8 fucking AM...damn...Anyway, I won't know what kind of grades I got until the 2nd, so there.

As for Christmas, I have to admit I was terrified and anxious to go to Idaho again. I was concerned about being around a family of VERY devout mormons. For anyone who's met my parents, imagine them times 10, and you've got just ONE of my aunt's family members (family of 8, including the one that is already married and the one who is on a mission to Argentina). Anyway, the main two reasons I wasn't looking forward to it was that prop 8 passed with a HUGE support from the Mormon church (and knowing my mothers side of the family, they had a hand in helping it along). Secondly, my aunt clearly has empty nest syndrome after her 4th of 4 kids she's birthed has finally graduated and has been doing foster care for the past few years. Granted, it all started after her first kid flew the coop about 3 years ago, but you get my point. Further, she's adopted two of her foster kids, and they were to get sealed to the family per the mormon tradition in the Idaho Falls Temple for time and all eternity (yadda yadda yadda) the SATURDAY we would be leaving for Montana. Of course, I couldn't go, because I'm a idol-worshiping faggot. The big surprise came when my SISTER couldn't go on account that she needed special permission from her bishop and FORGOT the card that said she could go.

All in all, though, Christmas went very well. It was nice to be with the family, and NO ONE mentioned that I was not going to be at the sealing until the night before, when little Daryon (she's 12) asked "Are you gonna be there?" I said no, and that's when my sister said "Neither will I." I guess Daryon figured I had the same excuse. As for the spoils of war, I got most of what I asked for (books >_<), and a lot of cool things I didn't (settlers of catan, gift cards to hastings and walmart, among other things; yay warcrack addiction enabler and free food for a bit).

On the home front, Troy quit his job at Watkin-Shepard Trucking, and now has a job at DirecTV. The only problem with this is that he works from 2:30 to 11pm...which means every night I'm not working, I'm home alone and bored out of my skull without company. (party, anyone? jk) In any case, it's nice for him to have a job, because it was getting REALLY old being the breadwinner (jk)

Finally, I come to the thing I've kinda been thinking about this week, and I have none other than Sakita to thank. I remember reading his journal a few years back, and seeing that he did something similar to this, and since then I've adopted the tradition. The rules are simple: I will name off everything that happened to me this year that was either a first for me, or something I never expected to do. So, here we go, in no real order:

1) Be Proposed to; Circa mid February, Troy and I got in a very heated argument/fight which ended in him proposing to me (whoda thunk, eh?)
2) Be Jesus. Okay, so I was only the second-string Jesus...but still!
3) Be a student Teaching applicant
4) Loose my engagement ring (yes, I lost it *sad panda*)
5) Loose 10 pounds from working out with the lion (sadly, I got it back over christmas week >_<)
6) Actually see myself going to AC this year, especially if I get as good a refund check as I did last semester.
7) Planning for my first tatoo: lynx on my back, and I'm slowly forming my plans for it too!
8) Pick up shamanism, be really good at it, then just kind of let it go in place of the path of a peaceful warrior/shaman/pagan thing :P
9) Finally started a cross-stitch project for myself (not even close to done though)
10) Actually pick up and ENJOY World of Warcrack.

And that's about it for me. I'm supposed to either do a top 10, or a full list, but I can't think of anything else, so I suppose it's a top 10 this year :)

Finals week ended today for me...YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111!!!!!!11!1!!!1!11!!!!!1!!!!one!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thank god this semester is done.

In other news, I have all of christmas week off ^_^

In other other news, I've discovered a new addiction: World of Warcrack.

That is all.

So yeah...listening to JCS right now...going through massive withdrawals. I honestly thought I was over the show, but since finishing, I can't stop thinking about the show...what's funny is that I can still picture the blocking in my mind...even in the parts I wasn't on stage...

Re Everet: Troy caught him in the neverending web of lies. Haven't heard from him since that weekend.

Speaking of Troy, he had his 37th b-day...haha, old fucker :P I had to work that day, but we had a lovely evening with friends playing munchkin and Imaginif, this awesome game in which you vote on answers to questions about each other...really fun, but I kept getting the dirty questions...

Re work: I hate black friday. I hate dumbass customers who can't find their own damn feet. I hate lazy fat ass whales who say "I can't stand for very long" and yet will wait in line for a fucking wii or xbox360 for 30 minutes. I hate fucking associates who say "Oh, I closed last night. I'm not going to take my lunch break, and leave an hour early...oh, and by the way, all the closing associates will be coming in an hour late so they don't go overtime...so you're going to be stuck running the two busiest departments for an hour during the busiest two hour block of the day. See you later!"

Bitches all of you.

In hind sight though, having to work thanksgiving and and extra hour today will equate to big paycheck next week...which will be NICE...I might be able to actually start saving for AC this time around :)

Speaking of AC and thanksgiving and troy's b-day, it was really nice to hang out with Kiwa and Sakita. I was thoroughly amused when they came over for troy's bday. Not five minutes after they come over, Sakita and another friend of mine are debating the pros and cons of 4th ed D&D. Geeks all of you.

Finally, I've got the student teaching application due on Monday...it's fucking time consuming and annoying as all hell. I wish I could jab my eyes out with a pen and just skip to teaching at Next Step Prep.

Jesus Christ Superstar was AWESOME!!!!!!

I almost lost my voice the first week of the show, but I figured out (somehow) to keep from losing it again.

Now I have time to catch up on homework (done), relax (soo not done :P), and do some cross-stitchin (something i haven't done in soooo long).

In other news, Troy and I got scammed by some fudgepacker in Georgia. The story goes that this guy, Everett, had moved up to Montana to be with a boyfriend. Turns out, the bf was a lying skank, and Everett was left in Havre with nowhere to go and no money. He gets ahold of Troy through gay.com, and asks him to help him out. Troy sends 50 bucks for gas, and we wait until 1am for Everett to show up.

He never does.

Troy gets a call from Ev later that day saying that he was in an accident as he left Havre and was admitted to the hospital. His truck had been towed, and needed 30 bucks. Troy sends the money, and no word from the poor bastard until tonight (two days later), when I text him and call him asking about how he's doing.

He asks us to come to Havre and help him out, but as we're about do to so, he says it's not necessary, that a friend got some money and might be able to help out. Turns out that the "friend" didn't get enough, and Troy sends him 100 bucks.

Just outta curiosity, I did a couple readings with the totem cards. I asked what the lesson was we needed to learn from this escapade. I got: Raven, Wolf, and Dragonfly. Raven, in this deck, is an amplifier to the next card. Wolf is Troy's totem, and Dragonfly is the totem of Illusions. Translation: The lesson was for Troy, and he needed to look past the obvious reactions. To make things even more interesting, I pulled another card for clarification. Who else would I draw than Lynx, the Totem of looking beyond the obvious for the true knowledge.

The second reading I did was on "What is the goal from this lesson?" Again, Raven, Wolf, and then Dove, the Totem of Calm and Serenity. Translation: Troy needs to take a moment to think things through before acting, instead of trusting his knee-jerk reactions.

So after being duped outta 180 bucks, hopefully Troy's got the lesson learned: If it walks like a duck, smells like a cat, looks like a dog, and says it's a llama, make sure it's actually a horse.

Or something like that.

Mkay...Not much to talk about. Frankly, the only reason i'm posting today is because I feel like it and i actually have some fracking time to post.

School sucks, but not as much as it has in semesters past. I'm taking like 14 or 15 credits, but it's all 300+ classes in the Ed program, so tons of "group projects" but no papers (THANK YOU GOD!!!!)

Speaking of god, JCS has been coming along EXCELLENTLY!!!! We're just over 2 weeks away from opening, and by then end of tonight, everything will be completely blocked...which leaves more room for character development. As I'm one of the apostles, this is an awesome chance to get more into character. I've decided to be Andrew, patron saint of singers, Scotland, and Greece...anyone who knows troy knows that he's part Scottish. Anyone who knows me (otherwise, why would you be reading this???), knows I'm a follower of the Greek pantheon.

To add to the creepy destiny crap, before I decided to be andrew,  we did a scene where the apostles have an 8-count, where they freeze on count 8. My freeze was with forearms crossed, fingers extended. Turns out, Andrew was hung on an X cross, not a T-cross like Jesus and Peter. Andrew also was the brother of John, and me and another guy are always right next to each other in scenes where the apostles are together.

So yeah...I'm Andrew.

In other news, work hours suck because I have to do the show. Troy and I are doing well. And I may or may not be commished by der Lion-buttz for a spandexdrous suit of non-furrysuit-ness.

on my new Dell Inspiron 1525!!!! yay!

Classes are good.

School is good.

I'm playing an Apostle and Jebus understudy in MCT's Jesus Christ Superstar.

That's about it.

The end.

Well, it's that time of the year folks...when I look forward to celebrating the day of my birth, and it all comes crashing down on me, not the least of which is the fact that I have to fucking WORK THE NIGHT OF MY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!

But let me back up and catch you all up on what is going on in my life.

Denver was FUCKING AWESOME!!!!! I had so much fun there, and met some really fun people. I'm contemplating finding a job there when I get my degree (although I don't think I'd want to teach in Denver proper...maybe one of the suburbs would be nice). It would be nice to be able to say that I lived somewhere other than Montana for once in my life.

Troy threw a surprise at me when we were in Denver. He took me to see Sweeney Todd ON STAGE, and it was *AMAZING*!!!! This one was especially cool because they only had ten actors (one for each of the main parts), and they all did the music themselves. So, you'd have two or three actors singing, while everyone else was on stage accompanying...in some cases, the actors played WHILE singing! Holy crap!!!

I am constantly amazed at my ability to sleep in a car. We drove for a couple days, and not 15 minutes after we got going, my ass was asleep. I would be asleep for the next several hours, until I woke up and had to make a rest stop. We'd pull over, do our thing, and get back on the road. 10 minutes later, my ass would be out for the next several hours. What's even better is that after we stopped for the night, I would sleep all the way through the night, and I'd wake up in the morning all ready to go.

Work has been pretty good. I'm getting fairly good hours, and my 6th month evaluation is coming up at the end of this month. I'm not worried about not passing my eval...gods know I work my ass off every day. I'm more worried about not getting the raise I really deserve. I'm only at 7/hour, and I feel like I'm working like i'm at 9 or 10 an hour. I've talked with some of my associates about what they're getting paid, and what they got on their 6th month, and many of them say they got fucked...that they only got 10 cent raises, 25 cent raises...that some had been promoted to manager positions and they didn't even get a dollar raise! One manager finally quit, because he just wasn't getting the money he needed.


I honestly want to know, people...is this at all normal??? Should I be worried about something? Is Troy the one at fault, or is it me? Or is there genuinely nothing wrong with us, and I'm just being a whiny horny twink?